To forgive = to not hate; acceptance of the wrongdoer's existence in your life
To forget = to be indifferent; not caring at all whether wrongdoer is in your life or not, happy or sad, dead or alive
I'm finding that forgiveness is much easier to do. Hating someone expends too much energy. And sometimes you have to be grown up and continue to see or interact with people you'd rather send to a place like... Zimbabwe.
The tricky part is forgetting. The goal is indifference. But to forget the sting of being hurt or betrayed - the timing of that feels so unpredictable.
I've been tossing around the phrase "To forgive and forget" in my head for awhile now, trying to make sense of it, because for me, those things don't feel like they go hand in hand. Can you do one and not the other? Can I forgive someone but never be able to forget? Or can I forget about something out of sheer old age, but yet never forgive them? I feel like I've done both but wondering if the forgiveness and the forgetfulness eventually cross paths one day.
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2 comments:
There's nothing wrong with a good memory unless you plan to make the same mistakes again. I know what you mean, though. It's hard to be carefree around a person when you can't forget about the hurt they've caused you.
you know me & forgetting. although, i try to forgive, it's VERY difficult to forget. i do think it helps though in protecting yourself. you won't stick your hand into the fire again, you know?
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