Healing

I'm a bad healer. By that, I don't mean I heal others badly. I actually possess no such powers. I mean, I heal badly. Slowly, painfully, awkwardly, and all twistedly (yeah, that's probably not a word).

Physically, I scar and it hangs around for months, years, sometimes permanently. My ankle scrape from July? It's still there on my ankle. I have a lovely purple bruise looking scar on my elbow. It's from 8th grade and happened when I fell down my friend's driveway as she tried to kill me by closing the garage door on my head as I walked out.

Emotionally, I seem to take about 10 times as long to heal from something than the actual thing itself, be it a falling out with a friend, a crushing from a boy, a fight with anyone I remotely care about, a careless comment, a forgotten gesture... I don't come out of it the same person. Though some may say it's a good thing, that you're supposed to come out stronger, I detest the helplessness of it all.

Bizarro Twin said it best when she told me "Every time these things happen, it all dings you a little bit. And it all starts adding up." Apparently, we're all at the age where the sum of it all is starting to weigh us down. I'm learning and trying very hard to let things go. But honestly, I think I'm healing all funny.