Work Void

As I've mentioned before, ever since I got back from the trip, there's been nonstop change to adapt to. I've mentioned the best friend being 6 months pregnant, the brother dumping his long time girlfriend, the departure of The Boy... and then there's the mass exodus of several work friends. Ten people in one month to be exact.

I was shocked and then sad. But what I didn't expect was this consistent void and feeling of disconnect the past week. Not to mention the grumpiness and indifference. My work load itself has been a breeze of late. I can't complain. Only two projects, boss too busy to bug me, clients behaving, artists behaving, long lunches, early departures. Yet I walk in every morning and think "God, I hate everybody and I want to go home." It's best not to talk to me before 11am, before I've come to my senses.

Half our company is filled with new people. Many fresh out of school, eager, unfamiliar with all the stories and histories of those who left and those who have been left behind. New people who unfortunately have met me at the wrong time and the wrong place, when I'm no longer eager to befriend them and help them out with everything they could possibly need - finding an apartment, suggestions on where to eat, places to shop for furniture, must-sees in this city... I've done that already, multiple times like Groundhogs day.

I miss certain friends, looking forward to having lunch with them each day, coffee runs, and getting the random IM's or chat breaks that helped a gal get through the day. Instead, I go home to eat alone half the time, no one to vent to about work (people who would actually know what I'm going through and the people I deal with) and I'm not sure what to look forward to at work each day anymore. I know I'll eventually get out of this funk and life will go on as usual. But for now, I'm in mourning. And yes, I'm hating the changes.